I’ve heard tell of a woman who only says things once.
She has five kids and never repeats herself.
I would pay money to actually see this legend of a woman in action, to sit in her house for the day taking notes. She could make a fortune running master classes!
Or maybe it’s just another urban myth. Like Bigfoot or the perfect family day out. Because honestly;
How is it possible?? I repeat the same damn phrases every damn day:
“Stop picking your nose”
“Please don’t feck your socks into the far corners of the room”
“Go back in, flush the loo and WASH YOUR HANDS!”
“Don’t take your hair down, it’ll get full of knots and you will scream the house down when I brush it out at bedtime” (queue screaming at bedtime)
“Stop touching the telly. Stop touching the telly. Stop touching the telly”
“Don’t stand on that, you’ll break it”
And every time I say “I won’t tell you again!” we all know fine well I will in about five minutes.
But why are kids designed this way? Genuinely? Animals only need to be told a few times then they don’t repeat the behaviour. So why do our little humans just keep on doing it??
Some days ‘the eyebrow’ works but it can get very achey stuck in a high arch while your child stares at you figuring out the message you’re trying to convey as they lean over the arm of the couch eating a jam sandwich, standing on a toy and hitting their sister.
And then other days I get wholeheartedly sick of the sound of my own voice, like a broken record scratching over and over. I’m hoarse come bedtime after nagging and moaning all day.
Those days can break you.
I know a lot of parenting is ‘pick your battles’ but when it’s the basics like hygiene or not damaging their siblings, you can’t pick and choose; the shittier part of the job just has to be done.
(Until we manage to track down where that lady lives…)